The Epic Waterfall Adventure
Is Not for the Faint of Heart!
Another entry written by my husband, Mark.
One of the fun parts of running a hotel in Costa Rica was sending guests out on various tours and activities. We had the wildest and best list of activities that I can imagine, including adrenaline pumping activities like surfing, scuba-diving, and waterfall rappelling to calmer activities like artisanal chocolate making, mangrove boat tours, and birding.
One day our hotel manager, AJ, came to me with an idea for a new adventure that we could offer to our guests.
In a secluded valley in the mountains above the hotel, two Costa Rican brothers in their late 40s lived on a large piece of land where they were born and raised. Part of the property was a working farm mostly producing coffee beans and dairy milk. But most of the property was a huge tract of pristine jungle that contained several really impressive waterfalls. AJ said the brothers wanted to start offering tours of their property to our guests to generate a new source of income. They asked if we could provide them some funding to spruce up the place a bit and improve the trails through the jungle. We liked the idea of supporting our neighbors, so we agreed.
For two weeks, AJ was up at the farm nearly every day helping the brothers prepare. When everything was ready, they asked me to come up and check it out. I would be the guinea pig testing out the potential guest experience. I was super excited to see it.
On the morning of the test, Oldemar, the older of the two brothers walked down the mountain to the hotel to pick me up. We hiked back up to their house together – a hike that gained about 1,000 feet in elevation over about an hour of walking. There was no road going up the mountain to the farm. I was sweating and breathing hard while Oldemar breezily trotted along beside me. When we got to the house, Oldemar announced that the first thing we would do was have breakfast. Dang, I wish I hadn’t already eaten at the hotel!
Oldemar and his brother Henry showed me their simple home. It was a wooden structure that consisted of a bedroom on one side with hammocks strung between the walls in lieu of beds. A living area made up the other half of the small house. The kitchen was an addition on the back of the house that included a wood-burning brick lined stove. The kitchen was filled with smoke as they boiled water for coffee, smoked meats on an iron grate, and cooked tortillas in a large skillet. The toilet was in an outhouse attached to the back of the home, and there was an outdoor shower. There was no electricity.
As I stood in the kitchen, I noticed that the faucet was running. Maybe someone forgot to turn it off? I was standing by the sink, so I asked Oldemar if I should turn it off. He asked me why. I thought to myself “Gee, I don’t know Oldemar, maybe because you are wasting tons of water up here while down at the hotel, we are guarding every drop?”
Trying to be as respectful as I could, I just said “Isn’t it wasting the water?” Oldemar laughed at me and said, “That water has been running like that for 40 years. It comes from the spring, through our faucet, down the drain, and back out to the stream that the spring feeds. There is no waste at all!” I think he was kidding about the water running for 40 years, but I felt a little stupid.
With the water mystery solved, we sat down for breakfast, and they served me a big mug of steaming black coffee. Now I don’t drink coffee, but there was no chance I was going to tell a coffee farmer that! After adding enough milk and sugar to make it taste like a milkshake, I drank it. Then they served me a huge bowl filled with boiled green bananas and white rice with boiled milk poured over the top. Have you ever had boiled green bananas? Imagine boiled potatoes but starchier and with a lot less flavor. Add to that the flavorless starchy rice and some almost flavorless milk – where’s the Cap’n Crunch? This bowl was double what I would normally eat for breakfast, and I had already eaten! I didn’t want to offend them, so I slowly worked my way through it. I think I ate about half of it before they finally had mercy on me and took it away. The fresh tortillas were the best part of the meal – smoky and warm, a little crisp on the edges but still soft too. Yum!
Now that I was stuffed full of starch, it was time to work it off. First stop was the dairy barn. I had never milked a cow before. Oldemar showed me how to do it. He was really efficient and could get a strong jet of milk with each squeeze of his hand. I only got a dribble and couldn’t shake the feeling that I was giving this cow a hand-job. Yikes! Enough milking. Let’s move on to picking coffee.
Oldemar explained the whole process of traditional coffee growing. Everything is done by hand. The coffee bushes are planted among taller fruit trees because they prefer a little shade, and it gives Oldemar and Henry another source of food in the same field as their cash crop. Genius! Working the coffee field was VERY hard work and I don’t even like coffee. After 30 minutes I felt like I had the gist of it and was ready to move on. If you enjoy coffee, know that some serious hard labor goes into every cup! ☕️
With our farm tour complete, it was time to hike the new trails we had funded and check out the waterfalls. We set off into the jungle. Immediately, it felt like a different world. Dark and damp with a slightly exciting feeling of danger. Maybe too dangerous??
AJ and the brothers had improved the trails a lot, but they were still only about a foot wide, and they were cut into steep slopes that dropped off into a rocky river canyon far below. Sometimes the drops were nearly vertical. There also could be venomous snakes, poison dart frogs, pumas and other hazards along the way.
At one point, Oldemar stopped me and said for the next few minutes, we must walk silently. There was a large hornet’s nest next to the trail, and he said that they will sometimes attack nearby sources of noise. A little terrified, I think I tip-toed the next hundred paces without even breathing.
The new trails formed a large loop through the jungle along both sides of the river valley. On either side of the valley, tributaries leading to the river crashed down in waterfalls through side canyons. The first couple of hours of hiking took us down one side of the river valley, then we were to cross the river to make our way back up the valley on the other side.
At the river crossing, there was a nice swimming hole with a waterfall dropping out of a slot canyon above in a perfect little fountain. It looked so artificial, but it was totally natural. I was glad to take a swim and wash off some of the sweat. In the swimming hole, the waterfall was like an ice-cold shower. I was quickly cooled down and refreshed. Climbing out of the water, I found a comfortable looking stone in the sun and sat down to dry off.
Oldemar pulled some folded banana leaves out of his satchel. He carefully unfolded the large leaves to reveal our lunch – homemade tamales with pork – still warm from the wood fire. That may have been the tastiest lunch of all time. Breakfast had been a C-, but lunch was A+. Or was it just because I was hungrier?
We passed dozens of waterfalls over the course of the day. As we made our way back up the valley, Oldemar showed me the spot along the river where his dad had made contrabando (moonshine) in a distillery that had long ago been reclaimed by the jungle.
At another spot, some huge Tarzan style vines hung from an ancient tree. Oldemar grabbed them and walked up the steep slope. He said I could swing from the vines, but I insisted he go first! He made it look fun and easy, so I went next. I swung out just fine but crashed into a bush on the way back. Still fun but not quite as easy.
The vine swing on another visit to the epic adventure with Marlo and friends! I still didn’t get the hang of it!!
As our hike neared its end, we came out of the jungle along a dirt road leading back to the farm. There, an enormous tree stood next to the road, towering 200 feet tall. I think it was called a ceiba tree. I mentioned to Oldemar how amazing it was, and he said, “That tree looked exactly like that 40 years ago when I was a little boy.” Amazing! I hope it still looks like that 40 years from now. I also hope that faucet is still running then.
I left Oldemar there and hiked alone another hour down the mountain to the hotel. I stumbled in about 8 hours after I had left – totally exhausted, thirsty and hungry. After a cold beer and a cold shower, I was able to reflect on the day.
The test was a success. Some of our guests would absolutely love this activity, but it isn’t for the faint of heart! You eat strange foods in a primitive kitchen. You get intimate with a cow. Picking coffee is hard! It is a long brutal hike. You get dirty and sweaty. It’s a little dangerous.
We added the Epic Waterfall Adventure to our list of available activities, and I gave our concierges these instructions: “If a guest says they want to do it, try to talk them out of it. Tell them to walk the trails on our property first and imagine they were going to do that all day. If they still insist it is what they want to do, then we know they are a good fit.”
Anyone going into it half-hearted wouldn’t like it. But the guests who went often told me it was one of the coolest experiences of their lives. I have to agree.
I DIED at giving the cow a hand job 😂 🤣
I loved all of this! It's a true cultural immersion/adventure tour! How amazing that it was their idea, locals are so crafty with ways to earn a living.
And, as usual, this reminded me of a hundred weird and random adventures I've done in places like this. Just say yes!
The vine swinging video looks familiar.