It’s a Bit of a Fixer Upper
Just call us Chip & Joanna!
When we visited the hotel as potential buyers, we saw quite a few things that we wanted to change. We’ve been around this block before. Our whole marriage we have liked home-improvement projects. We remodeled two homes and built another so we had some experience. The changes we identified could be grouped as the “things we didn’t like but could live with” and the “things we would have to change NOW.”
Things We Didn’t Like But Could Live With
The first thing we noticed was that the pool had a water feature that blocked THE MOST AWESOME VIEW in the world! From our location you could see the ocean, the mountains, and a unique coastal formation in our area of Costa Rica called the Whale’s Tail, but when you were sitting at the pool, you couldn’t see any of that.
There was a tall wall framing the back of the pool with a waterfall flowing into the pool. This waterfall completely blocked the view for anyone in the pool or on the pool deck. Why? Why would Gomer think that was a good look? (answer: because he was Gomer.)
The pool’s water feature wasn’t an immediate issue, it was just a ‘thing we didn’t like’ that could be changed in the future.
Another thing we eventually noticed was that there was another common area pool that could fit only 2 people. That pool was very ‘private’. So private in fact that no one knew that it existed! It wasn’t in a visible location. This pool was very, very deep - over my 5’2” head! It also didn’t have a ladder or steps to get out, so it was useless - unless you were over 6-feet tall and had the upper-body strength of a gymnast to lift yourself out. If you got in the pool, good luck getting out! Add that to the ‘things we didn’t like’ list.
Another item for the ‘things we didn’t like’ list was the hot tub area. It was small but had a great sunset view. However, the whole view to the west (read: the money view!) was obstructed by a pergola-like roof over this hot tub. The pergola-like thing was designed (yes, by Gomer!) to provide a little relief from the sun. But by pergola-like, I mean it really didn’t have a roof - just slats of rotting wood.
On Day 2 of our hotel ownership, Mark asked the maintenance team to remove the pergola-like roof thing!
Things We Had to Change Now
Before purchasing the hotel, we hired an inspection company to examine all aspects of the property, just as you would for the purchase of a home in the U.S. On the day of the inspection, a team of four arrived at the hotel looking very official. They had neon work vests, tape measures, cameras, clipboards, and electrical testing devices. Very impressive. They spent a whole day checking every building and produced a 24-page inspection report that seemed very thorough. They found a number of minor issues, but nothing that concerned us. Turns out the inspection was pretty much worthless.
We began to notice more than just the ‘things we didn’t like’. Bigger issues were popping up. One big one was that when it rained, the roof over the entire dining room leaked! Water would drip, drip in one spot, or just pour out of another. Eek-that might have to be changed now!
Then, our housekeeping staff told me that a washer wasn’t working. Then a dryer. Then the microwave in the kitchen failed. Next, the blender at the bar, kaput. Was it me, or did the team intend to break everything in our first month? What was happening?
You know in those home improvement shows when Chip or whoever opens up a wall and surprise! There’s always a bigger problem lurking behind the wall!
All electrical appliances were failing at an alarming rate!
At first, we chalked it up to the poor power quality in Costa Rica. While this is true – there are lots of power outages and voltage surges – we learned over time that those could be managed. We thought the electrical appliances and other devices were a lesser quality in Costa Rica than we were used to. This was also true, but this was not the root of the problem. Our main problem was that the hotel’s electrical system was a horror show. The previous owner (yes, Gomer again!) was a real tight-wad and had cut every corner conceivable when it came to electrical work.
Below is what our electrical boxes looked like – yikes! I’m not an electrician, but even I can see that something looks off with this mess. We didn’t take the covers off the electric boxes for this picture. There weren’t any covers!
Because of this wiring fiasco, we could barely stay in operation these first few weeks because so many things were failing. Over time, we would end up re-wiring the entire property. But we didn’t have time for that right now. We needed to clean laundry, keep the wine cool, blend drinks, heat water, and give the guests lights that actually worked in their rooms. The only quick solution was to go shopping!
But where? I had no idea. Where in our little town do you shop for appliances? And ALL of them at once?
There’s no Costco in Costa Rica!
We turned to our manager, AJ for answers.
In Costa Rica, there is a 13% sales tax on most items. We knew that we were going to be spending thousands of dollars on new appliances so the sales tax would add a lot to our costs.
There are two ways people sometimes avoid the tax. The first way is to drive to Panama and purchase items there. Lots of gringos living in Costa Rica go to Panama every 90 days to stock up on supplies and to renew their “tourist” visas (non-resident foreigners in Costa Rica have to leave the country every 90 days). The problem with this option was that customs officials will only let you enter Costa Rica tax-free with a limited amount of goods for personal use. Given the amount of shopping we needed to do, this wouldn’t work for us.
The second way to avoid Costa Rica’s sales tax was to shop at the duty-free zone in a town called Golfito. To encourage development in Costa Rica’s southern zone, the government set up a duty-free zone where residents can purchase up to the equivalent of $2,000 USD per year in goods tax free. There is a huge mall there that caters to people from all over the zone who come to make tax-free purchases. Our manager AJ recommended that option to us. I was in the U.S. at the time wrapping up the sale of our U.S. home, so Mark and AJ set off for Golfito in the new pickup truck we had just purchased for the hotel.
As they made the 2-hour drive from the hotel to Golfito, AJ explained to Mark how the process worked. The tax exemption is only available to Costa Rica residents. We were not Costa Rican residents but AJ was, so with his ID, they would be able to purchase $2,000 worth of goods. Mark was concerned that $2,000 wasn’t nearly enough given our long shopping list. (remember for each ID card, you can purchase $2,000 worth of goods).
AJ laughed and told Mark not to worry. There are Costa Ricans who go to Golfito to rent out their identification cards. They hang out in the parking lot. You find them when you arrive, and they come into the mall with you. When you are ready to check out, they show the cashier their identification cards. You give each person $20 as a “rental fee”. Mark and AJ ‘rented’ 3 or 4 additional cards that day.
After purchasing clothes washers, dryers, wine refrigerators, light fixtures, dehumidifiers, water heaters, blenders, microwave ovens, fans, and who knows what else, they loaded up the pickup truck like the Grinch’s sled when he stole the toys from the Whos in Whoville.
Certain times of the year in the southern part of Costa Rica, rains come in the afternoon. As Mark and AJ drove back to the hotel, a huge tropical downpour opened up on them. All those cardboard boxes slowly disintegrated. Between the steep climb up our mountain road and the wet boxes, they had no idea what might be falling off the back of the truck. Luckily, they made it back, and everything was still there. Wet, but still there.
We eventually found an amazing Costa Rican electrician who helped us re-wire everything in the hotel, and we never had to make another trip to Golfito. As far as I know, there’s still no Costco in Costa Rica.
And as for our Fixer Upper, we didn’t yet realize how many more things we would need to change. Much, much more…
Your description of the inspection process is fascinating and definitely made me think of our own move to Mexico, except in our case we were told it's effectively impossible to get a home inspected because it's not a profession which exists here. I'm really not sure how this works with larger buildings (such as those in the city near us, Oaxaca de Juárez) but it seems there are no building codes to follow here in Oaxaca, and you don't seem to need to get permission to build anything. You could hire someone who knows what they're doing to walk your property and sort of do their best to eyeball what's going on, but that's hardly a scientific or certified process. I'm still wrapping my head around it.
OMG 😂😂😂😂😂 I'm dying at the photos of the Who Sled LOOOOOL!! That's exactly what it looks like!
I also LOVE that people will rent out their identities in a parking lot LMAO! This was one of my favorite posts so far. A perfect example of real life for people who THINK they want to go live in paradise. It's never simple!